Requiem for Harriett

Today is another important birthday in my family. One of the most important ancestors I had the privilege of meeting; my Great Aunt Harriett Rouse.

Harriett at around the age of 30, ca. 1959

Harriett Nixon Rouse was born on April 4th or 5th, 1929 in Hertford, Perquimans County, North Carolina. She was the eighth and youngest child of my third great grandmother, Emma Jean Rouse (nee Jenkins, 1893-1967) and the younger sister of my second great grandmother, Anna Beamon (nee Brown, 1911-1989). She spent part of her childhood in Virginia Beach before returning to Hertford around 1940. 

Young Harriett, ca. 1940s-50s

She attended school up to around 7th grade, where she dropped out to begin working. She worked as a housekeeper for a local family for many years, the granddaughter of the woman she once cared for would bake sweets for her and send them to her later in life. She had a son, Gary, who unfortunately passed away young after moving to New York, and grandchildren and great grandchildren. Harriett was a pivotal figure in my genealogical and spiritual journey. For the first 15 years of my life, I didn't know she existed. My mother's complicated childhood caused her to be raised separately from a large portion of our family. It was only when our cousin Celestine "Celest" (I'll dedicate a post to her one day), approached me and my mom in a parking lot in Virginia Beach that we learned of her existence. "Do you know where you come from?" she asked my mom, rather abruptly and sternly. My mom frankly said no and Celestine continued, "well you need to meet your Great Aunt Harriett. She's still alive and 86 years old. She lives in Hertford, North Carolina". She gave us her address and we soon made provisions to meet our aunt. Harriett had not seen my mom since she was practically a newborn. Over forty years of separation. At the time, Harriett lived in a trailer that was somewhat in bad shape. She was wearing a light blue embroidered gown and her silver thin hair was combed back. Her brown skin was emblazoned by the early spring sunlight and her prominent cheekbones gave way to her welcoming grin. Her voice was gravely with the years of experience but was tinged with the sweetness of a loving elder. The visage of her mother's face, all of our collective mother's face, was at the time unknowingly peering right at us. The trailer was quite small and muggy. She had a few photo albums stacked on a shelf and as she began to recount the basics of our family history to us, I flipped through. I never once at the point expected to ever see so many old pictures of my family in my life. I was stunned when I came across the photo of my great grandmother, her face being a near reflection of my own. Family secrets, scandals and discoveries were made that day. Not too long after that, Harriett moved into a rancher on the other side of Hertford, past the train tracks. Where "the white folks used to live" as she described it. My family made it a habit to visit Harriett and for a time, her older brother Rufus, every year for several years.

From left to right: Emma Jenkins Rouse, Rufus Rouse and Harriett Rouse. Circa late 1940s-50s.

Harriett's wit, wisdom and warmth is part of what jumpstarted my journey to discover more about my family history. She was nicknamed by her nieces and nephews as "Bite" and "Harrietta", she was almost always seen chewing tobacco even in her 90s, she enjoyed boxed Chardonnay and serial Westerns. She was frank and witty, she imparted advice and care and when taken aback would plainly exclaim, "well, I declare!"

Harriett passed from this world to the next on October 9, 2024 at the age of 95 years. The entire 8 years I knew her, she was lucid and retained a great memory. I cannot even begin to imagine meeting my older sister's adult great great grandchild. She was truly a blessing on this Earth and everyday I'm grateful that I had the chance to know her, my life wouldn't be the same without her.

Harriett, ca. 1970s~80s

Harriett ca. 1990s~2000s

Harriett at her 93rd birthday party, April 2022